T. Boone Pickens Remembered

T. Boone Pickens Remembered

How many oilmen propose wind power? The late T. Boone Pickens did in 2007.  He sold his oil business, then opened BP Capital Management hedge funds at 68. Made his first billion at 70. Working with people, adjusting to changing markets, and charity mark his life.

Later in life he reported, “I have earned $4 billion, lost $2 billion and given $1 billion away.” In his 60+ year career T Boone Pickens had many successes, failures, and life’s comebacks.

T. Boone Pickens donated $11 million to the University of Texas Center for Brain Health in 2006. He was talked into having his brain scanned. His brain lite up like a man 30 years his junior. T. Boone was always more interested in being around sharp minds interested in what was new or changing.

Forbes has an article with T. Boone Pickens' Letter To The Class Of 2018. Let’s listen to his advice:

“A fool with a plan can beat a genius with no plan.” - His Father’s

“Keep focused. When you are hunting elephants, don’t get distracted chasing rabbits.”

“Don’t fall victim to what I call the ‘ready-aim-aim-aim-aim’ syndrome. You must be willing to fire.”

“Work hard. Come early, stay late.”

“Be the eternal optimist.”

“The higher the monkey climbs a tree, the more you can see his ass.” - Be confident, yet modest.

After describing his experiences and “Booneisms” he encourages us, “Now go get ‘em!”

https://www.forbes.com/sites/tboonepickens/2018/05/11/ninety-years-of-lessons-learned-t-boone-pickens-letter-to-the-class-of-2018/#3d0b57b3e3c6

Drive Fast, Take Chances

Not what we wish people. “Take Care”, “Drive Safe”, “Safe Travels”, or “Have a Safe Trip” is how we wish loved ones goodbye. 

Not Lenny Aniello. An iconoclast, beard, ponytail, Yale grad, and probably underdressed. Son of a business owner, he owned his programming business back when no one understood computers nor heard of Arpanet or AOL. 

His customers were often the insurance companies, home of preppy dress codes, standardized cubical wall heights, and formal rules. Lenny knew they wanted his skills. Those days he could make a mini computer act like a mainframe. He would show up on a motorcycle wearing leathers at business meetings. The meetings usually went well.

Lenny knew the interesting conversations weren’t boring. Errors are how you learn. Side roads are where some of your best memories are found. Technology is developed by trial and error. It is needed today, not tomorrow. Nothing is accomplished without someone taking a risk. 

Lenny wanted the best for his kids and friends. He pushed us to be better. Go be uncomfortable. Fail now and then. Laugh about it. 

Hope made Lenny proud - taking work in 7 states, owning 2 businesses, writing books, public speaking, still playing volleyball, and always learning.

The safe way is not how you get ahead. Drive Fast, Take Chances.

Like Everyone

Looking back I was miserably shy, fearful, and sure I wasn’t good enough. Once I got to know people, was good at listening and opening up with people. The best decision I made was to like everyone. My perspective became “what do I like about this person?” not “what are they after?”

Being shy was a self-centered fear of not sure what. Don’t talk to strangers? That went away liking people. 

Difficult coworkers? Figured out most of them seriously cared about the quality of their work. When you care about work as well, they become understandable and relax with you. 

Know 1% - 3% of people are dangerous/evil. But the majority are interesting nice people. They deserve our attention, care and appreciation. When people know you care, they open up and take care of you as well.

My life and work has been enriched meeting business owners, coworkers, customers, suppliers, dishwashers and janitors. My decision to like people was wonderful life/business choice have never regretted.

Grief Old Acquaintance

In honor of Charles

Recovering from cross-country trip for a funeral. It is wonderful to see family, even for a sad occasion. Do not travel as well as a few decades ago. Jet lag, plus a headache that has not gone away for 2+ days. Fortunately today responding to aspirin (wasn’t before).

The parents I went to see lost a newborn. The worse because we all start with such hope for the future. Suddenly there is a problem with development. Medical science offers an option. Then nature says no. Losing a child is just devastating. No one to blame.

My nephew’s father-in-law lost his mom this week. This is easier because more expectation at her age and health. Lost dad about 2 years ago now, and miss him. My stepmom is still devastated he is gone. Mom when to the Lord 16 years ago suddenly, and still there are days she is really missed. Always hard to lose parents.

My wife has been expecting her mother to recover from old age and dementia for years now. Only recently since her last trip has she started to face facts. Been afraid she was setting herself up for a hard time.

My good friend Bob is grieving his loss of health to cancer 8 years ago. Bladder surgery saved his life, but he has been reduced from healthy worker to disabled residential care patient in constant pain. Not a life any of us expect. He went from highly respected professional employee to depending on aid. He misses his old life. You would too.

Have had to move between companies and several states to keep working in my field. You grieve for the loss of friends and coworkers who you depended on. You are often lost until you get to build social networks in your new life. But we miss the old comforts of your old life.

We all have or will experience grief. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s 5 stages of grief are well known - Denial, Bargaining, Anger, Depression and Acceptance. Grief is a process, not an event to recover from.

My experience is you have to be kind to yourself or the grieving person. Let yourself/them grieve, remember and talk about it. Nobody does grief the same way.

Be patient. This is measured in months or years. Grief does not resolve itself quickly. Too many push for normalcy now.  We are uncomfortable. But we/they are not over it. The process takes time. My stepmom is finally showing signs of being herself after 2 years, and she is not done yet.

Don’t isolate yourself. Isolation leads to being stuck in the process, self-medication and other unhelpful behavior. Find others who have been through similar experiences. Charles parents should find Bereaved Parents of the USA, a church grief group, or a grief group through the local hospitals or YMCA/YWCA. No one should be alone during this time.

If you are upset, yell at God. He is big enough to take it. Better than taking it out on people around you. And being upset is part of the process.

Not an expert at grief. At a funeral of a father with young children, an 18 year old friend was crying while we tried to talk. She tried to apologize. Told her it was okay to cry. I did not feel any better than she did. I just had more practice being older.

Fortunately there are angels among us who show their love. In every event see friends, neighbors and coworkers bring food, company and support. Impressed by the volunteers at church for receptions. Thank them so much.

Give the last word to Charles father. He spoke “How he had never know such love as when Charles was born.” It is up to us to give love to the grieving, or experience love in healing.

"The key to emotional health is to learn how to handle grief. The person who reacts to sorrow only with anger becomes embittered, hardened, and cynical." - Nido Qubein, President High Point University, Author

Charles parents have requested donations to Children's Hospital of Philadelphia. Will include a link if anyone would like to join me.

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia

https://www.facebook.com/ChildrensHospitalofPhiladelphia/

Bereaved Parents of the USA

https://www.bereavedparentsusa.org

5 Stages of Grief and other resources

https://grief.com

Less Resolutions Equal More Success

New Year’s Day is the traditional start of resolutions. Like we could actually do something the morning after a New Year’s Eve celebration.

Not a fan of the annual start to your diet, saving money, and joining a gym. There is nothing magical about January 1^st. When you are ready to make a change, Start Now.

Two reasons most resolutions fail:

1. We try to do too much at once.

2. We don’t figure out why we want to change.

Warren Buffet’s method is to write down 25 professional goals, then focus on the 5 most important goals, and ignore the rest. He considers the other goals distractions from succeeding at more important goals.

My take is we can only accomplish up to 3 goals at a time. By limiting my focus to one or two goals at a time, am more likely to succeed sooner. Complete more goals in a year by focusing on fewer goals.

Most people are not focused, and lose motivation the first few times they meet resistance. The reason is they have not thought out their why.

Often make tweaks to my work routine. The reason these tweaks usually take is my motivation is to Do Meaningful Work Well. Like to be 1% better than yesterday. If this means have to drop some habits or start a new routine, so be it.

My strongest motivations are fairly simple.

Here to Serve Customers, Their Customers and My Coworkers. If it requires extra effort, okay.

My Brain Needs a Healthy Body to Carry It Around. Why you see me run pitifully on days off, and take frequent walks. Lost 10 - 15 pounds when necessary at 1 pound per month. Changes that last.

Do not to tie up every minute in a day. Free time is thinking time. This is where you can really make large leaps in innovation and productivity. Keep asking different questions when you do.

“Those who are wise won’t be busy, and those who are too busy can’t be wise.” - Lin Yutang

Have not changed my resolutions this year. My whys are a compass that guide me. What are your whys?

Emergency Vacation Home Maintenance Car Replacement Budget

Life is not simple. Things go wrong and at the wrong time. This year replaced a car, paid for vacations, paid for 2018 trip to Alaska, replaced powder room vanity, and now have to have a crown plus a wisdom tooth extracted. 3 out of 5 were unexpected, and a 4^th was not planned for this year. Did not have to sweat how going to pay for these. Paid cash. Covered by several years’ savings.

~59% of Americans do not have $500-$1,000 to cover an emergency (Bankrate). They would have to put on a credit card or borrow from family/friends. Very uncomfortable position. Been there. How did I get free from those worries?

Any savings is better than none. Start small. Can you spend $5 - $20 less per week? What are you paying for you don’t need? What can you sell you don’t need anymore? Use the freed up income to start.

Spending less than you earn reduces your stress. Stash the cash separate from your spending money so not tempted to spend it. Windfalls go here too. The act of having to transfer the money discourages blowing it.

Put the surplus in a separate account once you have enough. Have a credit union savings account in addition to bank checking & savings accounts. This is where my fund goes separate from monthly expenses. If you are just starting out recommend you get a credit union checking and savings accounts. Put basic expenses plus entertainment spending in checking. Then deposit surplus into savings.

I use one account for Vacations, Christmas Shopping, Emergencies, Home Maintenance and Car Replacement. Not a strict budget. This year creating a HSA account for medical, but the same savings account covers any excess bills.

My budget is rule of thumb based. When my car payment was over, the same amount transferred into savings. Covers car replacement and repairs on older car. If was still paying for car, use to budget $100 per month. Clothes wear out or have to be replaced. Use my monthly average for last year’s spending. Gifts are number you buy for times people buying for. (Not an extravagant giver) Home ownership requires maintenance, so my parents budgeted an extra mortgage payment to cover improvements & repairs. This is my minimum goal for year divided by # paychecks. Simple, but works.

Most of us get a raise every year. My raises get split between increasing 401k contributions, increasing savings, charity donations, and covering increasing costs. If you move it before you see it, you won’t miss spending it.

Took me years to get ahead. Don’t be afraid to start today. Peace of mind is worth it.

Learning Empathy

With experience we learn more ways to solve problems. We heard ideas from other people. We have seen alternates ideas tried, and the results. We can apply these same ideas in more situations.

We have learned money is not always the answer. And there are times where money buys the solution. We learn when to prioritize it.

Understand little children will be little boys & girls - noisy, full of energy and running around. Understand teenagers will be teenagers with so many insecurities, and so much they don’t know yet. Understand parents are encountering so much they have not seen, and feel so inadequate.

Understand when others are in pain, because of my injuries. Understand their frustration because of my frustrations. Understand it may not be their fault because of times it was not my fault. Understand jobs become unbearable or go away.

Understand we grow old, and our minds say yes while our bodies refuse to cooperate.

People are more important to us despite their problems they bring. Customers are often a challenge. Suppliers and vendors miss deadlines. Family and friends can disappoint you. Through it all relationships are a priority.

 “With Age Comes Wisdom” is the expression. More important we learn empathy. People need our empathy.

Life’s Rules of Thumb

Growing up was taught simple shortcuts to solve issues or designs. People learned them from experience. Now they are called “Life Hacks”. Here are a few of my Rules of Thumb:

Life is Hard

Bad days will hit you. Family and Friends die. Jobs go away or we get fired. Illness strikes. Mental illness strikes loved ones, or happen to you. No one has life go right every day. We all suffer.

Life is Awkward

No one learns anything the first time. We date the wrong person. We are confronted by the unexpected. We make mistakes and bad decisions. (Parenting anyone?) This is called Experience.

Ask Questions and Ruminate

No one knows everything. Business, technology and customers change every year. Learn is ask questions and listen to answers. People will tell you surprises about their lives. Find time to think deeply about what is happening. Where are the challenges? Where are opportunities? What changes can you make?

Try Things

Knowledge is useless without Action. Try what you learn, and learn more from trying. Making mistakes and failing are learning.

“Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life.” - Sophia Loren

Faith is Necessary

We need an anchor dealing with life’s trials and difficulties. Meditation is wonderful. Meditation with prayer is better. Know God Love You.

“I do not believe because I understand. I believe so I can understand.”

Life is Worth It

Yes life is good. It is not other people recognizing you. It is when you said the right thing to someone who needs to hear it. You give a hand or encourage someone who needs one. We all need someone’s help. You discipline a kid or employee so they learn. You may not realize it until later. You did good. Keep track of what went right. Be grateful every day for something.

 "You will never know how high you can jump until you reach a failure point." - Rev. Robert Schuller

Behavioral Economics and Us

Jason Zweig starts off his WSJ Moneybeat column “Investors believe the darnest things.” Turns out wealthy investors believe they can earn 8.5% return. Don’t they know the economy is growing ~2% last 5 years, bonds are returning 2%-3%, stocks are near record high Price/Earnings and less likely to grow?

More astounding ‘One in Six’ Institutional Investors believe they can earn 20%. This is despite a record of below average returns. These are not mom & pop investors like you and me.

We should not be surprised the cause of these beliefs. People avoid information that will cause them to feel or think in a way they don’t want to. Smoker avoid the Surgeon General Warning. Dieters do break down for that piece of cake.

Blogger Mr. Money Mustache says, “Yes! The politicians like to cultivate fear, jealously and entitlement because these are strong emotional triggers.” No wonder partisans of both parties cannot agree. Both are ignoring evidence disagreeing with their beliefs. However neither party has a monopoly on good ideas.

Nobody likes to look at their shrinking funds when the market has an inevitable recession. We hate to sell investments that have gone down in price because we have to acknowledge the loss. It is easier to pretend it will recover. People then give up and sell out near the bottom of the market. Then are unaware of the start of eventual recovery and miss market gains.

George Soros record of investment is outstanding. George says a large part of his success is acknowledging an idea is not working and limiting his losses.

We need to be more humble and admit there may be better ideas out there. Actively search for different opinions and let your ideas be challenged. Try to build a consensus before rushing ahead.

When planning a project, define what success will look like. Then figure how to measure the results. Lean Startups look for a minimum viable product / service to test if there is a market for it.

It is okay to be wrong and fail. How else do we learn?

See Think for Yourself for more ideas on confirmation bias