Happy 2021

 At 12:01 am January 1^st, all Hindsight is truly 2020 😀

(lost who to credit for this)

 

First let us acknowledge parts of 2020 were horrible – pandemic, economic, layoffs, illnesses, politics, weather, earthquakes, volcanos and deaths. There is an emotional toll for isolation and canceling events and vacations.

 

However there were good parts to 2020 to recognize – adapting, resilience and recovery. Give yourself and people around you credit for what went right.

 

We set goals for each year for many reasons. The people who recognize and write down why this is a goal are much more likely to persist through hardships and learning events to succeed. Worthwhile goals like learning new skills take several years to accomplish.

 

Losing 10 pounds was a goal one year, but the reason is wanted good health for rest of life. Hitting 192 lbs. left me feeling lousy for no easy to see reason, and could see myself on path to adult onset diabetes which affected my dad. That motivated me to make permanent changes which led to weight loss. Lost 15 lbs. over 18 months and have kept it off about 15 years now. How? Cut portions, carbs, sweets and started tracking weight and steps daily. Have simple 10 year old spreadsheet. Could see the results of my weekly efforts and adjust actions. 

 

Determine why you want that goal. What are the benefits? Emergency savings has made unexpected expenses a minor inconvenience instead of a major financial challenge to be overcome. 

 

One goal that has remained constant for 30 years is to earn more. Forces me to learn new skills and take more responsibilities every year. Being more valuable has improved my work and given me more options for employment or self employment. 

 

The world changes every year, so do you. Give yourself credit for your successes. Celebrate them. Then create more. Understand why to make your goals happen.

Wishing everyone a happy, blessed and healthy new year 

Secret to a Good Life

CBS News closing story Wednesday was about Florida State University’s Travis Rudolph visiting a school with his teammates. Instead of joining a busy table he saw a young boy by himself and sat with him. They had a wonderful talk, and Bo’s mom shared the story of him sitting with her autistic son.

Travis Rudolph is a good young man with a kind heart. He also knows the secret to a good life. This will follow him throughout his life, his time in football, his parenting, and his career. He demonstrated it with a simple act of kindness.

Get out of your own worries and needs. It is not about you. Help someone else.

Travis did not like bullying and made sure to sit with someone who needed him. Asked about the story by a reporter, Travis stated what great kid Bo was and offered his cell number to Bo’s mom if she wanted it.

Today every kid wanted to sit with Bo at lunch.

This is the second story today heard where you don’t know who you are influencing today. A 23-year-old airman headed home for his father’s wedding. He got stuck with his step mom’s 12-year-old nephew. The last thing a 23 year old wanted to do for a day. He took the boy to the air base, show him around airplanes, and talked about setting goals and working toward them.

5 years later received a videotape of the boy graduating as valedictorian, talking about achieving goals and becoming a pilot.

6 years after that he has graduated the Naval Academy and is a pilot.

Now the picture I saw today wish I could share, but it is not mine. After 17 more years the pilot is commanding officer of the Blue Angels, and he is standing in front of a blue & gold Hornet with the former airman’s two sons (the youngest is 12). You have never seen a happier, prouder smile on anyone than the Lt Ryan Bernacchi returning the favor of influencing the next generation.

Never underestimate the effect of doing the right thing, talking with someone, doing something nice, or just doing your job right. You never know who is watching and learning from you. You may never know the effect, it probably won’t be in the news, but your life will be wonderful.

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/fsu-player-travis-rudolph-sits-with-sixth-grade-boy-with-autism-eating-lunch-alone/

Mom's 80th Birthday

 Mom is has been gone 14 years, but today would have been her 80th birthday. Alice Moriarty was one of the first 3 women ever to go to Newark College of Engineering (now New Jersey Institute of Technology). 

Mom was an off the chart high school math student. In the statewide test, mom did not finish 1^st, 2^nd or 3^rd, but in the next group of 10. She always proudly said she was not the 10^th, implying closer to 4^th or 5^th.

So mom went off to study engineering, became a cheerleader, her photo used in school brochures, and met dad in the theatre presentation. Can’t remember the name of the show, but they often sang one of the songs together over the years.

Today’s ladies think nothing of technology careers, but mom’s biggest challenge was often other women criticizing her. She got grief for playing touch football with us for example. Suspect a lot were intimidated by intelligence and education in a world where women stayed home.

Mom did stay home after I was born raising my younger sister and brother as well. When my brother went to college she went back to school to get her bachelors in economics. Very proud to go to her graduation.

Mom had a lot of medical problems, but that did not stop her from traveling the world, camping across country with 3 teenagers, and seeing the Pope in person. Not bad for a little girl from Jersey.

The main lesson to share is to do whatever you put your mind to. Expect to overcome obstacles, unbelievers, critics, health issues, and bad luck. You may not know how to get there exactly, but following a goal will take you far.

Be a Better You

"Be at war with your vices; at peace with your neighbors, and let every New Year find you a better man." - Benjamin Franklin

Everyone would like to improve. Why else do we make New Years resolutions? We want to make more money, get promoted, lose weight or find the love of our life.

Instead of making very general resolutions that will fail in the first weeks, choose what you will succeed at. That is right, you are going to succeed.

How do I know this works? Have done it. Who else do you know planned to lose 10 pounds, and lost 16? Successfully lost weight and kept it off for years.

Lets Get Started

Start writing a list of desires.  Where do you want your life to be better? Get paper now.

Why do you want to improve this part of your life? Write down all the reasons.

What values & beliefs of yours support these ideas/resolutions? Write them down.

What values & beliefs hold you back? If you think wealth makes you an evil and mean, you will sabotage your efforts. Write down the values/beliefs why you can’t do it. Are they true? I really doubt it. There will be difficulties, but nothing you can’t work around or overcome. Your talent and hard work will be rewarded.

Now comes the hard part. Which resolution is no. 1?  You need to put them in order.  Which resolution is most important to your values and actions?

Then you pick. Preferably choose only 1 resolution, but no more than 3. May be one major and a minor one? You choose which goals to succeed at.

Now start planning how you will succeed at your first resolution. What steps are necessary for you to consider your experience a success? What can you start today? Focus on what you control.

Repeat if you are working on a second resolution.

Why It Works

Focusing on a few goals, and creating actions you follow get faster results. The more you value a goal, the harder you will work to succeed at your resolution.

Writing it down is another reason for success. Write the goal as if it has already happened. Write the actions as if the past and you did them already. You mind will follow you.

The results may take longer or be less than expected. Sticking with it gets results.

Results

Weight loss, was it easy? No. Did I fail at times? Yes, of course. But I stuck with it.

Was technically not fat, just at the higher end of my healthy weight range. However was not playing volleyball 4 times a week nor weightlifting. Sitting around let me gain weight. Just did not feel good physically. Motivation included Dad getting Adult Onset Diabetes. Taking care of myself could prevent that.

 My plan was rather simple. I gained weight one pound at a time. Losing it was going to be the same. Skipped the diet and went immediately to a maintenance plan. Less carbs, smaller portions, more exercise, and add some healthy foods. Did not give up any foods I loved, just limited how much I ate them.

Another secret, allowed myself one cheat day per week. Still could go for cake at a birthday, donut on Sunday, or restaurant meal. Spread them out by dieting 6 days a week.

Results: 16 pounds lost in 18 months. You have heard the last 10 pounds is the hardest to lose? That was my whole goal. Weight did not fall off easy. But have maintained the gain 5 years by making a permanent change.

Second did go through unemployment and find a new job while losing weight. Succeeding at one goal supported working towards another goal.

Follow Thru

Lots of people think they have to be perfect to accomplish anything. Not true. Every plan will have setbacks and make adjustments. Your plan must allow for changes, celebrations and vacations.

People think focusing on one or few changes, the other goals will not happen. Truth is by focusing you complete goals faster. Success motivates you to start the other goals expecting to succeed.

Pick your most valuable goal, and write down your plan. Then adapt and adjust your plan until you succeed.

Following this plan myself. Will let you know how I make out. Let me know how your plan worked for you.

A very happy New Year to you, your friends and family.